Scientist discovers new 49th gender

The gender, known as “hermachodite”, carries the recognizable trait of a micropenis 2.5 inches in length and 3.5 inches in girth, with testicles that look like labia.

The appropriate pronoun to use for members of this gender is “zhuh.” Calling someone of the hermachodite gender “he” or “she”, or even “they” or “zher”, constitutes a hate crime.


Applications for identifying as this gender are currently being accepted.

To identify as this gender and receive your official hermachodite badge, simply mail your request, along with a Self-Addressed Stamped Envelope, to the DNC Headquarters, c/o Pat.

Make sure you also:

  1. Place the pronoun “zhuh” in your Twitter bio.

  2. Post a vlog on YouTube about the challenges of being a hermachodite.

  3. Condescendingly correct anyone who refers to you as a man, woman, or zher. Get with the times, people.

Update: We’ve received word that Gender Studies professors in Portland are already encouraging their students to identify as hermachodite.